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Showing posts with the label aging

Helping Your Aging Parents: What To Expect

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One of the toughest things many of us face is dealing with our parents as they age. Watching someone you love decline is not pleasant. I will tell you my parents' story because it is probably rather typical, and the one I know best. As my mom and dad started struggling with older age issues I had to learn as I went along. Since I lived within 35 minutes of their home, I became the primary caregiver. My brothers lived quite far away. They did what they could with occasional visits, but the bulk of the responsibility fell on my wife and me. We were just fine with that role and enjoyed a strong loving relationship with mom and dad. In 2006, my parents had the foresight to move into a retirement community. Dad was 82 and mom was 79. At that point, both were in good physical and mental shape, certainly well enough to be allowed into the community. It offered independent and assisted living options as well as a nursing care center. They wanted to avoid the situation where ...

Retirement: Feeling Fulfilled Is a Personal Path

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A month ago I had a post about working after retirement .  Then, there was one about volunteering. There have been posts about financial investing after retirement , moving , developing your passions. ...kind of a laundry list of topics that retirees have said are important. But, still stuck in my mind was a comment from earlier in the summer from a reader that took me to task for what may have been a bit of a contrarian view. He wrote that being busy, traveling, volunteering, or engaging with others isn't really the only way to took at retirement. His point was that not everyone wants to do those things to feel fulfilled. Not every satisfying retirement journey involves all sorts of activities.  His comment wasn't health-related. It was not that he can't do these things, it's that he chooses not to. His view is that he worked hard all his life to get to a point where he could stop, disengage, unconnect. Being alone with his thoughts, reading when he wanted to, sittin...

Exercise: What Do You Do To Stay Healthy?

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Regular reader, Madeline, asked if I would take a look at an area that many of us struggle with: exercise. A recent study found that a higher percentage of those 65+ are more concerned about health issues than financial stability. That makes sense since a major health crisis can do major damage to one's financial situation, even with Medicare and supplemental insurance in place. It is a given that moving our bodies is helpful. Suggestions for people our age center on both cardio or aerobic and well as weight bearing activities. Thirty minutes a day for at least five days a week of walking and a few days of muscle strengthening exercises seems to be the consensus. If you jog or run, the total time can be reduced by half. I can only speak for me, but that exercise frequency is not always met. Since Betty rejoined our gym we are doing better; 4 days a week is pretty typical. We start on the treadmill and then move to free weights or machines. During the cooler months...

Two Simple Quotes About Life To Ponder

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Recently, I have been sorting through a few shelves of books in my office, deciding which ones to give away and which ones to re-read. While doing so, I stumbled across two quotes that prompted this post: " Simplify the material side of our lives and enrich the nonmaterial side" This is from well-known simplicity author,  Duane Elgin. Over the years I have owned and enjoyed several of his books.  Voluntary Simplicity  was one of my first exposures to the topic of cutting back and reducing consumption. First published over 35 years ago, he has reissued this important work several times. Even after several re-reading of this book, I continue to find something to inspire me. This quote is a good example. I haven't counted, but I would guess I have written at least 50 posts on the importance of focusing on the nonmaterial side of life during retirement. By the time we stop working, we have accumulated enough stuff to last for the rest of our life. Certainly, new clothes,...

A Reality Check

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I have been lucky. Throughout my life I have had few health problems. I went to a doctor for checkups and an occasional medical bump in the road. Even spending 150 days  each year in airplanes and hotels rarely resulted in more than a cold or occasional case of food poisoning. Things started to change about three or four years ago. Slowly, I began to notice strange pains, OK , strange to me. Some of my fingers seemed a bit stiff when I first woke up. A twinge in my lower back wouldn't go away after a hot shower. I had some shortness of breath after a bit of yard work. Two summers ago things got a little more serious during a trip to Portland: I ended up in the hospital for a few days with a cardiac episode. It wasn't a heart attack, but a small vein was blocked, resulting in pain and a small area of dead heart muscle. Scary for me, my wife, family, and friends, but eventually under control. A year later, sharp pains in my lower left side wouldn't respond to my normal treatm...

Is That All There Is?

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The end of a day: Is that it? If the title reminds you of a song by Peggy Lee, you are definitely a boomer retiree. In a rather bleak view of life, the lyrics suggest that if this is as good as it is going to get then let's dance and party before the final disappointment of death. During a time of upheavals in the late 1960s, this was a top 15 hit for Ms. Lee.  Why such a bleak title and introduction to this post? Take comfort, dear reader, the song's mood is not reflective of mine. I am not in the throes of despair. I do receive emails on a rather regular basis, however, that express at least some of this feeling about retirement.  There are three primary concerns: What did I do? I loved my job, I will run out of money, or my spouse is driving me crazy. I certainly understand these concerns. I flirted with similar ones after leaving the workforce 16 years ago. I didn't think I was ready financially, emotionally, or socially...pretty much a clean sweep of f...

5 Things We Can Stop Worrying About

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Have you ever seen the movie, The Curious Case  of Benjamin Button? T he lead character, played by Brad Pitt, gets physically younger while the rest of the world ages.  Eventually, it does not turn out well for him. He dies as an infant but with old age dementia.  In real life, there are actually some advantages to getting physically older, which is good since we don't have much choice. Here are five that came to mind: 1). We don't care nearly as much about how we look in a bathing suit (or birthday suit) . When we were younger, the effort expended to drop some weight before summer began was a common occurrence. Time spent jogging or at the gym become a fixed part of our schedule. Looking younger than our years was important. Face creams and lotions are a multi-billion dollar business.  While the health aspects of staying in shape remain important until we shuffle off our mortal coils, the reason changes. We are more concerned with our interior health than our e...

Delayed Retirement Maintenance Has a Cost

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For the majority of us the last effects of the 2008-09 recession are in our rear view mirror.  Unemployment rates are low and inflation seems to be under control. Interest rates on investments remain miserable, but decent returns are available with a little bit of risk. Housing prices have rebounded in most part of the country. That allowed Betty and me to move just about two years ago to be closer to our grandkids. We have been in the new house just long enough that my thoughts to turn to what maintenance should be considered, now and in the future. Owning a house means owning the problems that come with that property.  Delayed maintenance never got this bad Unfortunately, over the years I have become the master of delayed maintenance. If something isn't dangerous, leaking, or unusable, I find it much too easy to wait.   We know that something will require fixing but decide it can wait a while longer. That toilet is more difficult to flush, but it still works. The f...

Eliminate These 3 Retirement Stumbling Blocks

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A successful satisfying retirement can be upended by any number of problems, some of which you determine and some of which you don't. Your lifestyle and genes will play a large part in your health. Financial planning will be a crucial factor in how comfortable your life is after retirement. Your relationships can help make daily life happy or miserable.  There are three additional stumbling blocks to success that are completely under your control. None of them has to upend your journey. But, any one of them can, if you don't pay attention to their potential for problems. The number one stumbling block is lack of self confidence In previous posts I have stressed the importance of attitude in how satisfying your retirement will be. To steal an overused political phrase, I am doubling down on that belief by making this the most important stumbling block. You have made it this far in life by making more good decisions than bad, correcting mistakes, and maturing in your d...

Two Approaches to Retirement

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Retirement is a unique journey for each one of us. While there are basics that apply to everyone, it is the ability to shape this stage of life to meet our deepest desires and needs that make it so satisfying. If I had to simplify the process I suppose I could put retirement into two broad categories: the "reasonable, got it covered, done my homework" type of approach, and the "Let it roll, what will be will be, I will adjust as needed, it is all good" crowd. Neither of these are right...or wrong. That is what is so fascinating about writing a blog focused on retirement. Anytime I think I have it all figured out, someone leaves a comment, I read a new press release, or my own life kicks me in the shin and says, "Not so fast." Certainly, I fit much more comfortably into the first category. My career was decided at age 12. I fell in love with the life of a radio announcer and never wavered. Saving for retirement started at 24. I have experienced only two maj...

Aging in Place: Can You Do It?

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A growing trend among retirees is the desire to remain in one's home as long as possible. In fact, a recent study quoted by AARP shows 87% of those 65+ want to age in place for as long as it is safe. Even among those 10 years younger, 71% would opt to stay put. Familiarity and community ties are the biggest draws. Even so, the market for retirement communities remains strong,  such as Jimmy Buffett's new retirement community approach . Sun City communities and other planned offerings have adjusted to a more active lifestyle and the positives of providing care that includes nursing home facilities.  The ability to choose between staying home or moving to a retirement community or coop housing setup is a new development. In part, it has occurred because there are more options available to receive medical care in one's home. With nursing facility costs out of reach for many retirees, it is good news that other choices exist. For purposes of this post, let's assume you woul...

I Wish I'd Known This When I Retired

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Today, retirement comes with certain expectations. Popular literature, feedback from friends, books, Internet articles....all sorts of sources paint a picture of this stage of life. Getting an accurate overview of what is likely to happen is not that difficult. When I stopped full time work in 2001 things were different. There was very little retirement information that dealt with anything other than financial preparation. Sure, Sun City-type retirement communities painted a picture of never-ending leisure, happy folks playing cards, enjoying the pool, and tasting wine with friends every bit as good-looking as you.  When our parents retired, the life of golf, playing bridge, and days spent in the wood-shop was an appealing model. For many, things didn't work out that way, but that was the dream to aspire to. Because there wasn't a lot to go on, I began my journey with the same idea of what retirement should look like.  Within the first year away from my job, I b...

Showing Love: Helping Our Aging Parents

Almost six and a half years ago I wrote a post about how we exhibit  love when we care for our parents as they age. Just last week I re-read that post and felt a twinge: I still had both of my parents when it was written.  I wanted to share this with you again since this is something virtually all of us must deal with at some point. I haven't changed the original text which was written while both were still alive. For many of us, One of the toughest things we face is dealing with our parents as they age. Watching someone you love decline is not pleasant. My mom and dad are struggling so I am learning as I go. Since they live in town that makes my wife and me the primary caregivers, though my brothers do what they can by long distance. Almost 4 years ago, my parents had the foresight to move into a retirement community. It offers independent and assisted living options as well as a nursing care center. They wanted to avoid the situation where one or both became unable to c...

Social Security and Disability Insurance

The following is a guest post Social Security might be seared into your mind as an iconic symbol of American retirement. That’s for good reason, with 43 million people counted in 2015 as receiving $56 billion in retirement benefits. But people over 50 should also realize there’s another side to Social Security. It’s a major support program for people whose disabilities leave them unable to work.  Another 11 million workers with disabilities and their dependents collect more than $11 billion in Social Security Disability benefits.  And the Social Security Administration (SSA) predicts that your odds of needing the program will increase as you age.  Among people who are 20 years old today, the SSA estimates more than a quarter of them will develop disabilities before age 67. Applying for Social Security Disability (SSD) is a complex process, but it’s another element you might need to understand as part of your retirement planning. Understanding Social Security Disability Fi...